The following is a post from a wonderful Facebook group; Dysfunctional Veterans. If an admin from the page has an issue with me blogging this, please let me know and I’ll take it down. If you fancy some amusing content, wether veteran or civilian, head over to https://www.facebook.com/DysfunctionalVeterans.
You asked if you could help out us DV’s so here are a few of the areas where we would like your assistance:
1. Next time you see any adults talking (or wearing a hat) during the playing of the Nation Anthem – kick their ass.
2. When you witness, firsthand, someone burning the American Flag in protest – kick their ass.
3. Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a disabled veteran kicks their ass.
4. If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms ACUs or BDUs etc., telling others that you used to be “Special Forces”. Collecting GI Joes memorabilia, might have been okay when you were seven years old, now, it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.
5. Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, “Do you fly a jet?”. Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot.
Such ignorance deserves an ass-kicking (children are exempt).
6. If you witness someone calling the US Coast Guard “non-military”, inform them of their mistake – and kick their ass.
7. Next time Old Glory goes by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member of veteran lucky enough to be carrying her – of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass-kicking.
8. “Your mama wears combat boots” never made sense to me – stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a veteran and therefore would kick your ass.
9. ‘Flyboy’ (*Air Force*), ‘Jarhead’ (*Marine*), ‘Grunt’ (*Army*), ‘Squid’ (*Navy*), ‘Puddle Jumpers’ (*Coast Guard*), etc. are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. Using them could get your ass kicked.
10. Last, but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, please remember that there are literally thousand of Soldiers, Sailors, Marines, and Airmen far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our Country would get it’s ass kicked.
11. ‘It’s the Veteran, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press. It’s the Veteran, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech. It’s the Veteran, not the community organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate. It’s the Military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag.’